Is that what they think?
Mayawati has won the elections in Uttar Pradesh and after a long time, a party has come into power without any coalition. The Bahujan Samaj Party (BSP) has made people believe that it will bring a drastic (does that mean positive?) change in the so-called Uttam Pradesh of ex-chief minister Mulayam Singh Yadav. However, it’ll take at least 2 years before people can decide how effective this new government turns out to be for UP.
Having no interest in knowing what governments promise the public before elections, I hardly know what Mayawati proposed for the betterment of UP before winning the 206 seats that she did earlier this year. But during a train journey, I came about this person from the BSP who gave me an insight of what he thinks BSP is going to do and how it is going to make India a Supreme Power in the near future.
He was a really slim guy, easily over 6 feet in height, who moreover looked more like a scarecrow with a loose pink shirt and brown pants worn in the typical Indian fashion – tight at the waist and baggy near the feet. The encounter was more like a conversation between him and 3-4 other people but to avoid confusion, I’d like to present it in the form of an unquoted interview:
Guy: In the coming Lok Sabha elections, BSP is going to become a national party, winning at least 100 seats. If we win this election, then we can show the country how dedicatedly BSP can work for the betterment of the country.
Ques: But how will you bring about changes so easily in a coalition government?
Guy: If someone from BSP becomes the PM. (Are you talking about Mayawati?) Look at India’s history. The ‘Rajah’ has always ruled in India. Look at 3000 years of India’s history (I’m listening) - be it Muslims in the 8-9th century (is it?) – then Shivaji – the Christians (now when did Christians rule us?) – Sirf Rajah ka rule raha hai – After 1947, Nehru was Rajah (I thought we became democratic!) In today’s world, the PM and the CM are the Rajah. And the way the Rajah will rule the country, so will be the Praja!! – (Awesome!)
After talking about something else (which I failed to grasp and note down) he started off with the following:
Guy: India will soon become the best country in the World. That is because India has all the raw material (I wonder why the British came to India; ‘all raw material’? Is Middle East still on earth?) So India will be the leading nation of the world. (I don’t know why he added the following) “Abraham Lincoln has tried since he is 28-30 but he lost all the time until he become the President at 60.”- (now that one is quoted!)
Ques: But the country’s development can’t be done with through politics alone.
Guy: “It can succeeded.” – (Wow!) – All big shots will lose their land. When BSP comes to power, it will take up all the land illegally acquired by these big shots and they will be worth only begging on the streets.
Ques: How will this be done?
Guy: We’ll open up all their files.
Ques: But by the time you take serious action, your term will be over.
Guy: No! We’ll take fast decisions, within 24 hours (nice!).
Ques: But the judiciary doesn’t work according to the ruling party(at least not on paper).
Guy: We will control that also - (by?) – by Equality! (What the hell?) India ko usi ne govern kiya hai jo ‘castes’ ko sambhaal paaya hai. So we’ll have people from all the different castes in the government so that there is equality and quick and ‘just’ actions could be taken. (I beg your pardon!)
Luckily (for us), he didn’t stay for too long in the train and left after telling his name as Bharat Kumar – it had to be Bharat! Who else will be more concerned about the country than its own sons?? Lol!
But really, this post is not about making fun of this person or about what he thinks about India and his party. It is the thought that what kind of people constitute India’s present political domain. How the political parties are illusion-ing young individuals and making them work for their own benefit. I’m not blaming them for not doing there work. They are at least trying to run their homeland. But sometimes, I wonder if they are working only for their home or for their land too…
Tuesday, July 03, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
Reflection or Illusion?
Two long years of travelling between India and Singapore and where have I reached? I wonder why the feeling of patriotism and the sense of pride towards India took over me only after going to Singapore. I guess (also most-rightly said) we realize the actual worth of anything only after losing it. But have I really lost India? Or am I losing it in pieces?
There are times in Singapore when I come across Indian books, literature, culture and most influencingly the magnificent pictures of our innumerable national heritages. Several of my friends can act as witnesses to my hyper level of excitement during these moments. How I feel rejoiced if I can find something Indian on the streets, mention about India in SS modules or at the museum, about Subhas Chandra Bose's presence in Singapore even before independence, the president of Singapore being of an Indian origin and most importantly, Singapura - the name itself derived from Hindi. These things have always made me realize how much I love India and miss it during my time in Singapore.
But this time in India, a nascent feeling has surrounded me. I've started experiencing a sense of pride in being a part of Singapore - of this tiny state where I've spent merely 6.4% of my whole life (till date i.e.) Comes a news referring to what's new (or old) about Singapore and I find myself reading through the whole article as if trying to experience the comforts of my second home once again. All the more, I'll start talking about the different places I've been to and what's good (and rarely about what's bad) at certain places to whoever is sitting beside me.
It is turning out to be a total reciprocation of the feelings I have for India when in Singapore. When in India, I've always missed Singapore - the university, my friends, the climate, the easy transportation and the friendly and helpful nature of (most) people. But that doesn't mean that I've started looking down upon India. The rich culture of my country has always fascinated me and will continue to do so.
But I fear. I fear of being torn apart between these two nations. One, which gave me birth and helped me grow into what I am today and the second that is supporting me to build myself, a bright and reassuring future. Roughly speaking, I've been staying out of India for 2 years now but to be precise, I've just spent 494 days in Singapore. And I'm already having a feeling of being shared by the 2 countries. How can Singapore imprint an impression on me so deep in so less time that I've started looking at it the same way I look at India when overseas?
I wonder if it's a feeling of my acceptance of Singapore (and vice versa) or am I just being fascinated by a "developed" nation where there is absolutely nothing in the name of culture or natural beauty but artificially-lined trees, unnatural beaches and a working environment so alarmingly comfortable that it can easily make a jellyfish of a person. I am yet to discover what really is in my heart for this "City of Choices". Does it really takes India's place when I'm already here or is it just an illusioned reflection I'm looking at?
Two long years of travelling between India and Singapore and where have I reached? I wonder why the feeling of patriotism and the sense of pride towards India took over me only after going to Singapore. I guess (also most-rightly said) we realize the actual worth of anything only after losing it. But have I really lost India? Or am I losing it in pieces?
There are times in Singapore when I come across Indian books, literature, culture and most influencingly the magnificent pictures of our innumerable national heritages. Several of my friends can act as witnesses to my hyper level of excitement during these moments. How I feel rejoiced if I can find something Indian on the streets, mention about India in SS modules or at the museum, about Subhas Chandra Bose's presence in Singapore even before independence, the president of Singapore being of an Indian origin and most importantly, Singapura - the name itself derived from Hindi. These things have always made me realize how much I love India and miss it during my time in Singapore.
But this time in India, a nascent feeling has surrounded me. I've started experiencing a sense of pride in being a part of Singapore - of this tiny state where I've spent merely 6.4% of my whole life (till date i.e.) Comes a news referring to what's new (or old) about Singapore and I find myself reading through the whole article as if trying to experience the comforts of my second home once again. All the more, I'll start talking about the different places I've been to and what's good (and rarely about what's bad) at certain places to whoever is sitting beside me.
It is turning out to be a total reciprocation of the feelings I have for India when in Singapore. When in India, I've always missed Singapore - the university, my friends, the climate, the easy transportation and the friendly and helpful nature of (most) people. But that doesn't mean that I've started looking down upon India. The rich culture of my country has always fascinated me and will continue to do so.
But I fear. I fear of being torn apart between these two nations. One, which gave me birth and helped me grow into what I am today and the second that is supporting me to build myself, a bright and reassuring future. Roughly speaking, I've been staying out of India for 2 years now but to be precise, I've just spent 494 days in Singapore. And I'm already having a feeling of being shared by the 2 countries. How can Singapore imprint an impression on me so deep in so less time that I've started looking at it the same way I look at India when overseas?
I wonder if it's a feeling of my acceptance of Singapore (and vice versa) or am I just being fascinated by a "developed" nation where there is absolutely nothing in the name of culture or natural beauty but artificially-lined trees, unnatural beaches and a working environment so alarmingly comfortable that it can easily make a jellyfish of a person. I am yet to discover what really is in my heart for this "City of Choices". Does it really takes India's place when I'm already here or is it just an illusioned reflection I'm looking at?
Monday, June 11, 2007
Mera Bharat Mahan!!
During the last few weeks in India, I’ve been through such interesting incidents at 2 different Government Offices that I sadly feel that India has to come a long way - not in technical or economic fronts but in the attitude and behavior of the people – to try to become, as perceived by Dr. A.P.J. Abdul Kalam, a Developed Nation by 2020.
Scenario 1: During coming back from Singapore in early May this year I forgot to check out my room and return my transponder (an electronic equipment used to un/lock doors) at my Hostel Office. I called the Hostel Management people about the issue and they asked me to send the transponder to them by mail once I get back to my city. For the same, when I went to my nearest Post Office to Speed Post my transponder to Singapore, the person at the counter told me that since I’m sending an electronic item, I need to get it passed through the customs for which I was supposed to go to the Head Post Office of Agra City. It made to me complete sense to not allow “anyone” send “anything” by post.
At the Head Post Office, on being asked about Speed Post, the person at the Counter 1 referred me to Counter 4. All 6 counters in the office were next to each other. The guy at Counter 4 asked me to get the stuff checked by the Custom Officer. On being asked about his whereabouts, he said Andar baithe hain! and waved his hand towards his left – towards the main office and also towards Counter 1. I went inside the office through the other side and after passing through I-don’t-how-many rooms where everyone said Custom? Us room mein! always referring to the next room, I finally found out that the Custom Officer sits right behind the guy at Counter 1!
The Custom Officer – sounds like a serious person who keeps a strict eye on every article that comes under his nose. But the scene at this office: A 30-something normal looking guy sits behind a table – a table full of NOTHING. He absolutely had nothing on his table save a closed register and a plastic cup of tea.
Me: Sir, Mujhe ye saamaan Singapore bhejna hai. It’s a transponder. (He makes a questioning face.) Mere room ki key hai.
Officer: Key ka kya hai? Woh log doosri banwa lenge. :P
Me: This is an Electronic key. Agar nahi bheji to mera $40 charge lag jaayega. Aap check kar lijiye.
Officer: To bhej dijiye, problem kya hai?
Me: Woh keh rahe hain aap check karenge (pointing at Counter 4)
Officer: Arey aap waha pahucho to sahi.
I go to Counter 4 and ask the person to look towards the Custom Officer.
Custom Officer: Ye jo bhej rahe hain, bhej do. Who log Dilli mein check kar lenge. Yahaan par check karne ki koi zaroorat nahi hai!
I was like, What the hell? This person would have been appointed here to lessen the burden of the Officers at Delhi. And he is sitting ideally in this busy office doing absolutely nothing – so much so – he tends to avoid every work that comes his way. I thought of the various facilities and privileges people are offered while (and after) working in a Government Office and about the amount of work they (don't) do. The cut-throat competition to get into a Government Office in India suddenly seemed very rational to me.
Scenario 2: I entered the Hajrat Nizamuddin Railway Station in Delhi. It was 5pm and I had to buy a ticket to Agra for a 6 o'clock train. There were 5 ticket counters out of which, only 4 were operational. (Note that the ticket counter schedule confirms that all 5 counters should be operational after 2.30 till atleast 7 in the evening.) Luckily, there weren't any long queues at any of the counters and I decided to stand at counter 3 in spite of a shorter queue at counter 4 (coz there weren't many people at 3 also).
The queue moved fast and within 10 mins, I was the second person to be served. But as soon as the 1st person asked for a ticket, the counter manager kept a Khidki Bandh (Window Closed) sign in front of him - without any prior notification of his intentions or whatsoever. On being asked till when will the counter be closed, he gave no reply as if his duty ends wherever and whenever he wishes to and he is not answerable to any of the customer's queries. Easily came to my mind, a comparison to a private company, where the person-in-charge is commited to fulfil his customer's needs and sees that the customer doesn't feel offended in any manner.
By this time, the other queues had grown longer. Having no choice, I moved to the queue at counter 1 but after standing there for atleast 5 mins (and realizing that it hasn't moved an inch forward :P) I looked up towards the window. The counter incharge was either counting money or something but wasn't taking any orders from the customer standing at the counter. The guy in front of me told that it has been so since the last 10 minutes. It was past 5.15 and I decided to move to yet another queue to buy my ticket asap.
This time I joined the queue at counter 5. Even this queue was moving quite fast but as soon as I was the 2nd person (again!!) in the queue, the guy at the counter got up and just walked away - without saying a word. My eyes followed the man to the sides of the rectangular room until I could see no more. He was probably talking to someone in the other part of the room and drinking water. After 2 mins, he started walking towards his seat but just passed by. He went out of the office from the back door w/o even looking at the window (and the customers) he was supposed to attend. I started looking sideways, only to realize that the queues were no more short. There were just 2 queues now (at 4 and 5) and both had atleast 13-15 people compared to four 6-7 people long queues just 15 mins back. It was like, though the system had made provision for the passengers to get their tickets asap, it wasn't practically possible just because of the negligence of the employees towards their work.
I saw a woman with a 5 year old kid trying to get a ticket at counter 4; but to other's complain, refusing to stand in the line. On being asked, she said she can't stand in a line of 15 people with a kid that small. Obviously she was making excuses (and playing on emotions of others) to cut the line and get her work done easily but methods should be adopted so that people don't get a chance to exploit other's kindness. Methods, that are already there on paper but are hardly implemented.
After another 5-7 mins, the counter incharge came back and resumed his work as lazily as ever. Well, ignoring all the feelings I had against that guy (and against the Indian Railways) at that moment, I quickly bought my ticket and rushed towards the platform.
Staying in a foreign country, I've realized one thing: Its not the technical advancements and better quality goods that make a nation work smoothly; its the people - their behaviour and their attitude towards their fellowmen that paves the way for a developing country towards attaining its goals. Unless we start to believe in one another and exchange respect, India's path towards the First World seems to be indispensably difficult.
During the last few weeks in India, I’ve been through such interesting incidents at 2 different Government Offices that I sadly feel that India has to come a long way - not in technical or economic fronts but in the attitude and behavior of the people – to try to become, as perceived by Dr. A.P.J. Abdul Kalam, a Developed Nation by 2020.
Scenario 1: During coming back from Singapore in early May this year I forgot to check out my room and return my transponder (an electronic equipment used to un/lock doors) at my Hostel Office. I called the Hostel Management people about the issue and they asked me to send the transponder to them by mail once I get back to my city. For the same, when I went to my nearest Post Office to Speed Post my transponder to Singapore, the person at the counter told me that since I’m sending an electronic item, I need to get it passed through the customs for which I was supposed to go to the Head Post Office of Agra City. It made to me complete sense to not allow “anyone” send “anything” by post.
At the Head Post Office, on being asked about Speed Post, the person at the Counter 1 referred me to Counter 4. All 6 counters in the office were next to each other. The guy at Counter 4 asked me to get the stuff checked by the Custom Officer. On being asked about his whereabouts, he said Andar baithe hain! and waved his hand towards his left – towards the main office and also towards Counter 1. I went inside the office through the other side and after passing through I-don’t-how-many rooms where everyone said Custom? Us room mein! always referring to the next room, I finally found out that the Custom Officer sits right behind the guy at Counter 1!
The Custom Officer – sounds like a serious person who keeps a strict eye on every article that comes under his nose. But the scene at this office: A 30-something normal looking guy sits behind a table – a table full of NOTHING. He absolutely had nothing on his table save a closed register and a plastic cup of tea.
Me: Sir, Mujhe ye saamaan Singapore bhejna hai. It’s a transponder. (He makes a questioning face.) Mere room ki key hai.
Officer: Key ka kya hai? Woh log doosri banwa lenge. :P
Me: This is an Electronic key. Agar nahi bheji to mera $40 charge lag jaayega. Aap check kar lijiye.
Officer: To bhej dijiye, problem kya hai?
Me: Woh keh rahe hain aap check karenge (pointing at Counter 4)
Officer: Arey aap waha pahucho to sahi.
I go to Counter 4 and ask the person to look towards the Custom Officer.
Custom Officer: Ye jo bhej rahe hain, bhej do. Who log Dilli mein check kar lenge. Yahaan par check karne ki koi zaroorat nahi hai!
I was like, What the hell? This person would have been appointed here to lessen the burden of the Officers at Delhi. And he is sitting ideally in this busy office doing absolutely nothing – so much so – he tends to avoid every work that comes his way. I thought of the various facilities and privileges people are offered while (and after) working in a Government Office and about the amount of work they (don't) do. The cut-throat competition to get into a Government Office in India suddenly seemed very rational to me.
Scenario 2: I entered the Hajrat Nizamuddin Railway Station in Delhi. It was 5pm and I had to buy a ticket to Agra for a 6 o'clock train. There were 5 ticket counters out of which, only 4 were operational. (Note that the ticket counter schedule confirms that all 5 counters should be operational after 2.30 till atleast 7 in the evening.) Luckily, there weren't any long queues at any of the counters and I decided to stand at counter 3 in spite of a shorter queue at counter 4 (coz there weren't many people at 3 also).
The queue moved fast and within 10 mins, I was the second person to be served. But as soon as the 1st person asked for a ticket, the counter manager kept a Khidki Bandh (Window Closed) sign in front of him - without any prior notification of his intentions or whatsoever. On being asked till when will the counter be closed, he gave no reply as if his duty ends wherever and whenever he wishes to and he is not answerable to any of the customer's queries. Easily came to my mind, a comparison to a private company, where the person-in-charge is commited to fulfil his customer's needs and sees that the customer doesn't feel offended in any manner.
By this time, the other queues had grown longer. Having no choice, I moved to the queue at counter 1 but after standing there for atleast 5 mins (and realizing that it hasn't moved an inch forward :P) I looked up towards the window. The counter incharge was either counting money or something but wasn't taking any orders from the customer standing at the counter. The guy in front of me told that it has been so since the last 10 minutes. It was past 5.15 and I decided to move to yet another queue to buy my ticket asap.
This time I joined the queue at counter 5. Even this queue was moving quite fast but as soon as I was the 2nd person (again!!) in the queue, the guy at the counter got up and just walked away - without saying a word. My eyes followed the man to the sides of the rectangular room until I could see no more. He was probably talking to someone in the other part of the room and drinking water. After 2 mins, he started walking towards his seat but just passed by. He went out of the office from the back door w/o even looking at the window (and the customers) he was supposed to attend. I started looking sideways, only to realize that the queues were no more short. There were just 2 queues now (at 4 and 5) and both had atleast 13-15 people compared to four 6-7 people long queues just 15 mins back. It was like, though the system had made provision for the passengers to get their tickets asap, it wasn't practically possible just because of the negligence of the employees towards their work.
I saw a woman with a 5 year old kid trying to get a ticket at counter 4; but to other's complain, refusing to stand in the line. On being asked, she said she can't stand in a line of 15 people with a kid that small. Obviously she was making excuses (and playing on emotions of others) to cut the line and get her work done easily but methods should be adopted so that people don't get a chance to exploit other's kindness. Methods, that are already there on paper but are hardly implemented.
After another 5-7 mins, the counter incharge came back and resumed his work as lazily as ever. Well, ignoring all the feelings I had against that guy (and against the Indian Railways) at that moment, I quickly bought my ticket and rushed towards the platform.
Staying in a foreign country, I've realized one thing: Its not the technical advancements and better quality goods that make a nation work smoothly; its the people - their behaviour and their attitude towards their fellowmen that paves the way for a developing country towards attaining its goals. Unless we start to believe in one another and exchange respect, India's path towards the First World seems to be indispensably difficult.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Say NO to No!!
Isn't it high time someone got negative about negativity?
Yes it is.
Look around. The world is full of things that, according to nay-sayers, should never have happened.
"Impossible."
"Impracticle."
"No."
And yet "yes."
Yes, continents have been found.
Yes, men have played golf on the moon.
Yes, straw is being turned into biofuel to power cars.
Yes, yes, yes.
What does it take to turn no into yes?
Curiosity. An open mind. A willingness to take risks. And when the problem seems most insoluble, when the challenge is hardest, when everyone else is shaking their heads, to say: Let's Go!
PS: I actually read the above piece in a magazine and felt like posting it :P
Isn't it high time someone got negative about negativity?
Yes it is.
Look around. The world is full of things that, according to nay-sayers, should never have happened.
"Impossible."
"Impracticle."
"No."
And yet "yes."
Yes, continents have been found.
Yes, men have played golf on the moon.
Yes, straw is being turned into biofuel to power cars.
Yes, yes, yes.
What does it take to turn no into yes?
Curiosity. An open mind. A willingness to take risks. And when the problem seems most insoluble, when the challenge is hardest, when everyone else is shaking their heads, to say: Let's Go!
PS: I actually read the above piece in a magazine and felt like posting it :P
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Tagged!
Hi! I've been Tagged. Actually I was Tagged a looooong time back but initially I thought I'll blog only about lamitivity. :P Now I realize that I have many other things (read ideas) that I'd like to share with people. So I thought that to answer to this 'tag' thing will be the best choice to start with. So, here I am!!
Three things that scare me :
1. A Crying Joker
hmm... Can't think of anything else that scares me :)
Three people who make me laugh :
1. GPRS2 - includes all the members!!
2. Russel Peters
3. Eric Cartman from South Park
Three things I love :
1. Looking at the sky on a starry night (you just don't get to see many in S'pore :( )
2. Sleeping.
3. Being with Friends.
Three things I hate :
1. Working in an office without work/aircon/proper internet access (like right now)
2. Bitching about others.
3. When people don't keep their promises.
Three things I don't understand :
1. Why am I studyin Engineering
2. The Stock Market
3. I don't understand what I should write here.
Three things on my desk :
1. My laptop with all its peripherals (ext. keyboard/speakers).
2. Lots of crap.
3. Anything un-academic
Three things I am doing now :
1. Sitting jobless in my office, coz my boss is gonna come 4 hrs late today.
2. Blogging, coz the TCS ppl have blocked ALL other sites but blogspot - no other choice.
3. Asking random people in my office to read my blog and comment on it.
Three things I want to do before I die :
1. Visit Egypt - the Pyramids!
2. Sky diving
3. Learn French thoroughly
Three things I can do :
1. Crack Gande Jokes in literally every line.
2. Make friends (and be a good one!)
3. Dance - oh I've been missing it so badly in S'pore.
Three things you should listen to :
1. Your Mom-Dad.
2. Contemporary Music
3. ME - when I'm talking :D
Three things you should never listen to :
1. Gossips - if your intention is to believe them.
2. What the Daily Horoscope in the Newspaper says.
3. Politicians
Three things I'd like to learn :
1. How to manage Money :(
2. How to clean my room regularly. ;)
3. What is "good" (saaf) humour (if it really exists)
Three Favourite Foods :
1. Pav Bhaji
2. Daal Baati
3. Anything cooked by my Mom.
Three beverages I drink regularly:
1. Water (surprised?)
2. Ice Lemon Tea
3. Coffee
Three TV shows/books I watched/read as a kid :
1. I Dream of Jeanie/ The Famous Five Series
2. Small Wonder/ Archies
3. Just Mohabbat/ Champak
Three people I would love to tag :
Well, all the people I know who blog have already been Tagged. :P
Done!! (phew!!)
Hi! I've been Tagged. Actually I was Tagged a looooong time back but initially I thought I'll blog only about lamitivity. :P Now I realize that I have many other things (read ideas) that I'd like to share with people. So I thought that to answer to this 'tag' thing will be the best choice to start with. So, here I am!!
Three things that scare me :
1. A Crying Joker
hmm... Can't think of anything else that scares me :)
Three people who make me laugh :
1. GPRS2 - includes all the members!!
2. Russel Peters
3. Eric Cartman from South Park
Three things I love :
1. Looking at the sky on a starry night (you just don't get to see many in S'pore :( )
2. Sleeping.
3. Being with Friends.
Three things I hate :
1. Working in an office without work/aircon/proper internet access (like right now)
2. Bitching about others.
3. When people don't keep their promises.
Three things I don't understand :
1. Why am I studyin Engineering
2. The Stock Market
3. I don't understand what I should write here.
Three things on my desk :
1. My laptop with all its peripherals (ext. keyboard/speakers).
2. Lots of crap.
3. Anything un-academic
Three things I am doing now :
1. Sitting jobless in my office, coz my boss is gonna come 4 hrs late today.
2. Blogging, coz the TCS ppl have blocked ALL other sites but blogspot - no other choice.
3. Asking random people in my office to read my blog and comment on it.
Three things I want to do before I die :
1. Visit Egypt - the Pyramids!
2. Sky diving
3. Learn French thoroughly
Three things I can do :
1. Crack Gande Jokes in literally every line.
2. Make friends (and be a good one!)
3. Dance - oh I've been missing it so badly in S'pore.
Three things you should listen to :
1. Your Mom-Dad.
2. Contemporary Music
3. ME - when I'm talking :D
Three things you should never listen to :
1. Gossips - if your intention is to believe them.
2. What the Daily Horoscope in the Newspaper says.
3. Politicians
Three things I'd like to learn :
1. How to manage Money :(
2. How to clean my room regularly. ;)
3. What is "good" (saaf) humour (if it really exists)
Three Favourite Foods :
1. Pav Bhaji
2. Daal Baati
3. Anything cooked by my Mom.
Three beverages I drink regularly:
1. Water (surprised?)
2. Ice Lemon Tea
3. Coffee
Three TV shows/books I watched/read as a kid :
1. I Dream of Jeanie/ The Famous Five Series
2. Small Wonder/ Archies
3. Just Mohabbat/ Champak
Three people I would love to tag :
Well, all the people I know who blog have already been Tagged. :P
Done!! (phew!!)
Monday, May 21, 2007
Three...
Hello friends...
Well, I'd like to apologize for being so late in "updating" my blog...par kya karein...Control nahi hota :P Actually, I wasn’t able to get enough time to re-collect much material for this update… But then, I realized that it was getting too late…
So, Dear L.G.s and P.R. (Sorry, for I can’t reveal the full forms in public :D), welcome back to the Gandagi….
First of all, the major updates…
Arushi, a major, honorary and unique (being the only person in the sub-com) member has been pushing really hard to get a seat in the Main Ex-Co. She’s been trying really hard to convince each one of the Ex-Co members to become the first “Gandi Bachhi” of our Lame Club. So much so, that soon after the publishing of my last blog, Arushi posted the following commendable piece of scrap to all the Ex-Co members:
Arushi : Hi, I want to get promoted to the ex-co of GPRS2.. why don't u do some propaganda for me?? Or are u guys waiting for me to maaro a properganda??
LOL!!
- Never mind Arushi, even if you don’t get to that position soon, you’re still the top woman in the club. :P :P :P
To spread the word of GPRS2 and to make it a universally acclaimed club, Ranvir and Satya are planning to open a branch of the club in the US from coming July. These people are going to Silicon ‘Waali’..nahi Waaley.. or is it Valley?? I’m trying not to be pervert and so should you.. :P
- So we’re gonna have an American Chapter to the GPRS2 very soon.
Meanwhile, Pulak and I have decided to be as Gande as we have ever been. Recently, we were having a discussion about the grading system in NUS. We knew that below C, you directly get a D+ but not a C-. Also, someone told us that to pass, you need atleast a C (which is actually for the S/U modules, but we were ignorant of this fact at that time). So, we were discussing that if below C is fail, why do they have a certain D+ and another D (considering both depict “failure”) but no C-.
- We could only make out that may be D+ is to tell you ke aap pass ke pass hain… and at the same time, there can’t be a C- coz aap fail ke fail to ho nahi sakte… :P (I know it doesn’t sound too funny right now but we actually laughed - for about 5-10 mins - at the “stupidity” of our thoughts)
Well, this semester was full of “gandi meetings” – thanks to modules like EE2006 and EE2012 – which resulted in the formation of some awesome gande over the semester. Once Shankar, Pulak and I were having a discussion of why so many people are named “Tan” in Singapore. I suggested that coz Sentosa is near by, may be people often go there and get 'Tan'ned. (please don’t kill me!!)
But then somehow the discussion turned to how Singapore’s population is declining and then, came to our ganda mind:
What would happen if you have ‘sex’ on the beach??
Think think…
Sun-tan (Santaan!!) :P :P :P
Well, this joke got really famous until one day it reached Rajoshi’s ears when she asked me, What would have been if the beach was in Indonesia?
Well, she told me the answer………….. Bin-tan!! :P
At the start of this semester, there were several book stalls at the Central Forum and I often used to roam around the bazaar. On one of these days, I came across a book which I (I, being particularly and characteristically Me) decided to buy instantly. The book was titled: 10,001 of the World’s Worst Jokes !!
It is a huge, Encyclopedia-type book (in both height and breadth) with no name of either the author or the compiler. (Not) going through these details, I concluded that this must be some low publicized, unwanted publication. But in a few days, I came to know that another member of GPRS2, Neha, already has that book, which she had been using as an inspiration to hit “gande” jokes for years!!
I’m really Sorry for doing this to all you people but here are some examples of the level of Gandagi in that book:
# What time is it to go to the Dentist?
- Tooth – Hurty (2.30)
# What is common between Alexander the Great and Hermit the Frog??
- The same Middle Name!!
And here are my favourite: the Monstor Jokes!
# What did the baby monster say to his Babysitter?
- I want my Mummy!!
# Why did the sea monster eat more than one ships that were carrying potatoes?
- Coz No one can eat just one potato ships!!
# Why do they have a fence around the Graveyard?
- Everybody is dying to get in!!
# Why didn’t Dracula have many friends?
- He was a pain in the Neck!!
# What did the Vampire say when he was done biting someone?
- It was nice Gnawing you !! :)
What is Dracula’s favourite place in New York?
- The Vampire State Building !!
# What do you call a Lost Monster?
- A Where Wolf!!
Well, by know, you might have had a good (or rather bad) idea of the book. But what can I do. I really am so jobless at times during the semester. Once, during such jobless spans of time, I was browsing through my phone book when I came across a name which made me think of the following question:
Agar Dharti hamari Ma hai to Pita kaun hai??
Well, think of it.. Ma to pata hai, Pita kaun hoga?? Bhupati!! :P
Hehe..Avoiding most (or all?) of Emraan Hashmi’s movies, Mom’s husband should be the father no… :)
This semester, in one of our modules, Pulak and I were writing a report about the Narmada River Valley Project. Everything was working out fine until we came down to choosing an appropriate title for our report. After lot of speculations, we came up with the following title (and actually went ahead submitting the report with it). It was named: Narmada: Damned by Dam :P
Well, after the submission, I was telling Ranvir how we came up with this idea and also went ahead with it. And Ranvir, as always, came up with even a better (or worse?) idea:
Narmada: Shall we give it a Dam?
Hehe..I would just like to say…It was too Ranvir of him!! :P
I guess that’s enough gandagi...I should go take a shower now…:P
Signing out with a promise to post more often and not keeping people waiting (and scrapping me) for more of my Gande Jokes. :)
And by the way, here’s a last one from the book:
Once a guy went to the Doctor and said, “Doctor, I can’t differentiate between colors”
The doctor replied, “Oh! It’s just your Pigments of Imagination!!”
Take Care Guys!!
Cyaz!
Hello friends...
Well, I'd like to apologize for being so late in "updating" my blog...par kya karein...Control nahi hota :P Actually, I wasn’t able to get enough time to re-collect much material for this update… But then, I realized that it was getting too late…
So, Dear L.G.s and P.R. (Sorry, for I can’t reveal the full forms in public :D), welcome back to the Gandagi….
First of all, the major updates…
Arushi, a major, honorary and unique (being the only person in the sub-com) member has been pushing really hard to get a seat in the Main Ex-Co. She’s been trying really hard to convince each one of the Ex-Co members to become the first “Gandi Bachhi” of our Lame Club. So much so, that soon after the publishing of my last blog, Arushi posted the following commendable piece of scrap to all the Ex-Co members:
Arushi : Hi, I want to get promoted to the ex-co of GPRS2.. why don't u do some propaganda for me?? Or are u guys waiting for me to maaro a properganda??
LOL!!
- Never mind Arushi, even if you don’t get to that position soon, you’re still the top woman in the club. :P :P :P
To spread the word of GPRS2 and to make it a universally acclaimed club, Ranvir and Satya are planning to open a branch of the club in the US from coming July. These people are going to Silicon ‘Waali’..nahi Waaley.. or is it Valley?? I’m trying not to be pervert and so should you.. :P
- So we’re gonna have an American Chapter to the GPRS2 very soon.
Meanwhile, Pulak and I have decided to be as Gande as we have ever been. Recently, we were having a discussion about the grading system in NUS. We knew that below C, you directly get a D+ but not a C-. Also, someone told us that to pass, you need atleast a C (which is actually for the S/U modules, but we were ignorant of this fact at that time). So, we were discussing that if below C is fail, why do they have a certain D+ and another D (considering both depict “failure”) but no C-.
- We could only make out that may be D+ is to tell you ke aap pass ke pass hain… and at the same time, there can’t be a C- coz aap fail ke fail to ho nahi sakte… :P (I know it doesn’t sound too funny right now but we actually laughed - for about 5-10 mins - at the “stupidity” of our thoughts)
Well, this semester was full of “gandi meetings” – thanks to modules like EE2006 and EE2012 – which resulted in the formation of some awesome gande over the semester. Once Shankar, Pulak and I were having a discussion of why so many people are named “Tan” in Singapore. I suggested that coz Sentosa is near by, may be people often go there and get 'Tan'ned. (please don’t kill me!!)
But then somehow the discussion turned to how Singapore’s population is declining and then, came to our ganda mind:
What would happen if you have ‘sex’ on the beach??
Think think…
Sun-tan (Santaan!!) :P :P :P
Well, this joke got really famous until one day it reached Rajoshi’s ears when she asked me, What would have been if the beach was in Indonesia?
Well, she told me the answer………….. Bin-tan!! :P
At the start of this semester, there were several book stalls at the Central Forum and I often used to roam around the bazaar. On one of these days, I came across a book which I (I, being particularly and characteristically Me) decided to buy instantly. The book was titled: 10,001 of the World’s Worst Jokes !!
It is a huge, Encyclopedia-type book (in both height and breadth) with no name of either the author or the compiler. (Not) going through these details, I concluded that this must be some low publicized, unwanted publication. But in a few days, I came to know that another member of GPRS2, Neha, already has that book, which she had been using as an inspiration to hit “gande” jokes for years!!
I’m really Sorry for doing this to all you people but here are some examples of the level of Gandagi in that book:
# What time is it to go to the Dentist?
- Tooth – Hurty (2.30)
# What is common between Alexander the Great and Hermit the Frog??
- The same Middle Name!!
And here are my favourite: the Monstor Jokes!
# What did the baby monster say to his Babysitter?
- I want my Mummy!!
# Why did the sea monster eat more than one ships that were carrying potatoes?
- Coz No one can eat just one potato ships!!
# Why do they have a fence around the Graveyard?
- Everybody is dying to get in!!
# Why didn’t Dracula have many friends?
- He was a pain in the Neck!!
# What did the Vampire say when he was done biting someone?
- It was nice Gnawing you !! :)
What is Dracula’s favourite place in New York?
- The Vampire State Building !!
# What do you call a Lost Monster?
- A Where Wolf!!
Well, by know, you might have had a good (or rather bad) idea of the book. But what can I do. I really am so jobless at times during the semester. Once, during such jobless spans of time, I was browsing through my phone book when I came across a name which made me think of the following question:
Agar Dharti hamari Ma hai to Pita kaun hai??
Well, think of it.. Ma to pata hai, Pita kaun hoga?? Bhupati!! :P
Hehe..Avoiding most (or all?) of Emraan Hashmi’s movies, Mom’s husband should be the father no… :)
This semester, in one of our modules, Pulak and I were writing a report about the Narmada River Valley Project. Everything was working out fine until we came down to choosing an appropriate title for our report. After lot of speculations, we came up with the following title (and actually went ahead submitting the report with it). It was named: Narmada: Damned by Dam :P
Well, after the submission, I was telling Ranvir how we came up with this idea and also went ahead with it. And Ranvir, as always, came up with even a better (or worse?) idea:
Narmada: Shall we give it a Dam?
Hehe..I would just like to say…It was too Ranvir of him!! :P
I guess that’s enough gandagi...I should go take a shower now…:P
Signing out with a promise to post more often and not keeping people waiting (and scrapping me) for more of my Gande Jokes. :)
And by the way, here’s a last one from the book:
Once a guy went to the Doctor and said, “Doctor, I can’t differentiate between colors”
The doctor replied, “Oh! It’s just your Pigments of Imagination!!”
Take Care Guys!!
Cyaz!
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